So seminary studies are within full swing. And I feel that I am being showered with blessings and revelations from God in every class, with every interaction and through everyone. For example… I was struggling today with what it means to be a theologian and why I get excited about something I am not sure I what my calling is. and tonight in my systematic theology class we defined theology and what it means. And it was encouraging words to here the discussion of the lecture. I connected old memories with new ones, related my crazy Christian hippy music to a quote the teacher made of Thomas Merton (thank you Psalters) and felt the presence of God living there. I think that is truly the best part about seminary. And actually that was the answers to my prayer in class.
Lately I have been considering why I do theology. I think about this because I want to make sure this is what God is calling me towards: a life studying theology and either teaching it to people through a classroom or through a pulpit. Tonight we talked about how prayer & theology should be interrelated and I really enjoyed how Dr. Ok explained different theologians directing towards always inviting God into our studies because that His glory and promotion of his Kingdom is the ultimate goal. And especially we should pray because we are talking, speaking, dealing with the Lord’s “material” essentially and we should get our stuff straight (sorry–its late, my theological jargon is a little off.)
Another thing I have been trying to answer is why i get upset at my mom sometimes (yes, its related… if I should be acting in Christian love I shouldn’t be yelling & fighting with my mom.) So in praying to God about this concern over the last two nights in class I have heard how in Scripture we are called to live life & “always giving thanks to God” for what we go through, whether it be suffering of joyous. Last night in Greek we talked about this section in the text, tonight in systematic theology we look at the question “Did God cause 9/11?” and even if so (which I do not believe God would cause suffering) we are called as Christians to give thanks for such great mystery of faith & belief. Its scripture based, is encouraged by fellow believers. I think I should be more gracious. And tonight, by no action of my own, I realized I was thanking my mom for raising me in the church which allowed & supported my theological studies and thinking. And I thanked her for be herself, brains and all, for without that my brother and I would not be so… geeky. And I realized I was not only living out what I need to learn more of but also loving my mom as Christ does… which I know my mom needs more of.
Gracious living listening to God. That is my discovery for the day.